


Yours Truly, Castiel

by anneadley5584



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Character Death, Demon Ambush, Destiel - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-09
Updated: 2014-04-09
Packaged: 2018-01-18 19:44:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1440505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anneadley5584/pseuds/anneadley5584
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester and Castiel are at a diner on a date when demons ambush the two. Cas recalls what happens in a letter to Sam.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Yours Truly, Castiel

The demons attacked all at once. One second Dean and I were sitting in the booth of a diner waiting on Dean’s apple pie to be served and the next we were being ambushed. He yelled for me not to move so I would not get hurt which was plausible logic as I am human now and had no way of helping. It was almost like one of the movies that we had watched together as he stabbed one demon to the next with impeccable precision and years of skill. The last demon was stronger than the others and threw Dean into the glass mosaic in the middle of the diner that had depicted an old Cadillac. Glass shattered everywhere and there was a frozen expression of pain on Dean’s face. The first thing I felt was anger at the demon for hurting him and then a flood of panic began wondering about the extent of injury. The demon knife flew from Dean’s hand and onto the floor nearby me. The memory of the look on the demon’s face when I had grabbed it and stabbed him with more force than was necessary is still etched in my brain. Then again, what part of those few minutes isn't etched in my brain? Oh right, the few seconds after killing the demon. What I remember next was turning Dean over to see the extent of the damage. A large piece of the mosaic glass had buried itself into his back. That was when I started crying. I knew it was in too deep and he wouldn't make it past the next minute at most. Dean Winchester was dying in my arms and this time there was nothing I could do. Never before had I felt so hopeless, lost, powerless, or so agonizingly in emotional pain. "It's too bad, that pie looked awesome" Dean joked softly in pain as I cried praying for God to help me one last time. "Please Father, just this one last thing. I know I caused all of this. From the Leviathan to Metatron I have screwed up but please-not Dean. Don’t take him away from me now. Just when everything was starting to go right for us. I was happy until just now. I can't lose him. Please. Not now." My pleas went unanswered and I had never hated Heaven or the father as much as I did then. "It's okay, really Cas. Maybe it's time to join Bobby, Jo, Ellen, Dad, and hell, even Mom." He whispered, voice cracking and trying let loose his own tears. "Please Dean-you can't. I need you. I may have raised you perdition but you raised me Dean from my own personal Hell I barely knew I was living in. You saved me. You can't die. Not now. Not like this. I love you Dean. I've always loved you. From the moment I laid my hand on you, you were so beautifully human. You can't leave me, please. I'm nothing without you. Just a fallen angel.” Even though it’s been months since I had said that to Dean, it feels like yesterday and I still love him completely. "Oh Cas. Listen to me, you don't need me. You're a hero. You're a hunter. You're a Winchester. And you always have been no matter how much mojo you had in you. You've always been my personal angel. Remember that time at the Red Hotel when Lilith was still kicking I prayed to you for the first time and you told me that my praying was a sign of faith? It was only you that I had faith in. I love you too Cas but my time is up. Everything will be okay. Just tell Sammy to take care alright? Just remember that if there is anyone I would die happily for, it's you." Dean’s breath had gotten increasingly heavier and slower. My eyes were so blurry from my tears I could barely see and my own breathing was extremely rough as I recall. Sometimes I wake up at night with tear blurred vision not able to breathe from the nightmares of that day. "And what'd I always say about chick flick moments dude?" "Dean-please-" I had somehow managed to choke out. "See ya round angel." Dean winked at me despite the agony he had been in and took one last shaky breath as I screamed and pleaded for Dean to stay with me to no avail. I know I've never talked to you quite so in depth about what happened that day. I had just relied the basics as well as I could without revealing too much but I believe it best for you to know. Someone needs to know, and remember. These past few months have been an almost literal Hell for me and I can’t do this anymore. Everywhere I look, Dean is there and it hurts too much. I can see him walking around the bunker, reading a book for research, drinking beer and eating his pie. It's all still so clear, the way he would walk or look at me, the tones of his voice, his sarcasm and his smile. My dreams are constant reminders of him. Dean is always there and just as I go to reach out for him, to touch him, he disappears and suddenly I'm alone all over again..... The pills and alcohol no longer work. Drinking and swallowing as often as I have since his death has become almost ineffective due to a built up immunity I suppose. So this is my last resort. I’m sorry Sam. I hope that someday you are able to settle down and have as close to a safe life as possible. I have only been able to wish that Dean and I could have done so.  
Yours truly,  
Castiel.  
I signed the note and took a shaky breath while tears flooded down my cheeks as I raised Dean’s old pistol in my hand.  
_____________________________________________________________________________  
Sam Winchester was reading a book in his room within the bunker when he heard the gunshot. He had never run so quickly or even so hard in his entire life.


End file.
